Friday, February 26, 2010

You Know You're Just Dying to Find Out...

Bat-Assed Crazy Neighbor Update:

When we last met, Mr. Crazy was packin it all up, laundry appliances and all. It was quiet for the rest of the weekend, with the exception of a late night visit to pick up God-knows-what. Crazy Bitch was still AWOL, but we didn't think anything of it, since it was Valentine's weekend, and honestly if I suffered a breakup then, I'd probably not come home to face the empty house either.

So Monday morning, I'm sippin my coffee, and I hear noises next door. Being the concerned (nosy) neighbor that I am, I peeked through the window to see Mr. C's buddy (Mr. TOW-Mater) drive off with the new trash bins just delivered by the city a week earlier. So now I'm thinkin WTH? And then it dawned on me: Mr. Crazy did NOT leave Crazy Bitch as previously thought. Seriously, we think they skipped town! OK, I didn't see this one coming.

Again, being the concerned (REALLY nosy) neighbor that I am, I of course contacted our real estate agent, thinking she might have some insight. And just like a good piece of gossip, she was on it like stink on shit. (I don't know if she's a gossip hound, I just thought it sounded good when I wrote it...sorry.) No it's not in foreclosure YET, but they might have thought if they left town before it happened, nobody could find them! HA!

She suggested we call the city, and we plan to, but honestly I don't want to jinx it. So we've given it a couple of weeks. There has been snow on the ground most of the time and no sign of activity. *crossing fingers*

I think this calls for a happy dance!!!! *shakin it*

Oh Hell Yes!!!!

Saturday, February 13, 2010

I'm Trying Really Hard Not to Pee Myself from the Excitement

OK, I'll admit it. Every since our bat-assed crazy next-door neighbors moved in last year, we've been hoping something would happen and they'd 1) be forced to leave, most likely in handcuffs; 2) have a melodramatic falling out (no extra charge for the floor show!) and one of them would leave (likely him, cuz she's a giant be-yatch to be sure, who could blame him?), thereby causing the other to move and find another smaller place to live (far, far away from us). This scenario could also include option number one, as that's how they seem to roll.

Imagine our surprise when a trailer pulled up this morning and Mr. Crazy and his buddies started loading stuff up. Now I don't want to jump to conclusions, but either he is finally leaving Crazy Bitch, or they are doing some SERIOUS spring cleaning. It's a toss up, but you usually don't get rid of your washer and dryer unless there is something to replace it. And your furniture. And lawn stuff. And you usually don't scrub the trailer floor clean before loading such items, to ensure a squeaky clean ride.

Folks, I believe stage one of scenario 2 is now in effect! Oh. Hell. Yes.

Now don't get me wrong: I don't wish badness on these people. I just want them to take their FUCKEDY-FUCK-FUCK screamfests in the front yard and LEAVE. Seriously. I shit you not. Drunkenly screaming FUCK at him in the front yard. Dude, not cool. There are kids in the neighborhood, and adults with uh, DECORUM. Although I have to say it was a fine lesson for the Little Nugget: "See Babygirl, that's what happens when you have no self-respect."

So who knows how this will unfold. They could reconcile (he'd be an even bigger idiot than we suspected), or she will stay forever, become a drunken verbally abusive harpie (oops, too late!), and continue to loudly curse from her deck (which happens to be next to the Babygirl's swing set, joy-joy)!

Let's hope this turns out well. New neighbors. Nice ones this time. Please?

All for now,

Saturday, February 6, 2010

Really There are NO Excuses, but Try This One On For Size...

I SO had good intentions to rock hard on the remodelling project(s) underway and for about 2 hours I really opened up a serious can of whoop ass.

Yes, we sat around for some time this morning leisurely drinking our coffee and watching the renno-fest marathon that is HGTV on Saturday morning: Holmes on Homes, eh, and some other ones. I don't quite remember, it's all a blur of fencing, tiling, dry walling...And you'd think that would put a fire in our belly, but people, we were tired and clearly in need of much greater motivation than mere TV personalities were going to provide. At least for me. Hubby Nugget had far greater initiative at that point, but I needed additional prodding because I was tackling the dreaded problem: the butt-ugly, unevenly applied popcorn ceiling that the obviously EVIL previous owners put up. There really should be a law against that, if not some code violation.

Having already accepted (due to my habitual viewing of HGTV) that I will have to slip coat every square inch of wall in the house (the alternative being new drywall), I had yet to reach acceptance about what needed to be done with the ceiling. I envisioned water, drop cloths, breathing aparatii, and hours and hours of horrible aching tedious dirty work.

And all that was true, except the hours and hours part. The ceiling had been painted, so no need for water. I just knocked off the popcorn part, and was done in less than two hours. Which is awesome, except I had really just expected to work on that today, and wasn't really in the mood to start slip coating. (I have to psych myself up for something I've never done before. Well, I've done slip coat, but that was on plaster, no biggie. This is 50-year old sheet rock. Nuff said.)

Plus when I got done, then allowing clean-up time, it was about 4 o'clock, which really is too late in the day to start something new. Ehem. Now don't get me wrong, I've been busy: I cannot tell you how many messes and toy box explosions I've cleaned today. Plus laundry sorting...oh yes, and Monkey wrangling. That's job number one.

Oh who am I kidding...I feel like an unbelievable lazy turd right now, obsessively checking Facebook and the Blog-o-sphere for new updates. Busted! But I did do all that stuff today. I just feel bad that I should have done more. Oh well, some days you just need a day off...oh wait...TOMORROW'S MY BIRTHDAY!!! Well if that's not an excuse to be a slacker for 2 or 3 hours, I don't know what is!!!

Check out the computer game that's been occupying much of my lazy turd time: Pure Hidden. If you're into seek-and-find games and like really pretty, relaxing graphics, check it out! (note to self: must remember it's OK to take some relaxation time!!!!)

All for now,