Saturday, February 13, 2010

I'm Trying Really Hard Not to Pee Myself from the Excitement

OK, I'll admit it. Every since our bat-assed crazy next-door neighbors moved in last year, we've been hoping something would happen and they'd 1) be forced to leave, most likely in handcuffs; 2) have a melodramatic falling out (no extra charge for the floor show!) and one of them would leave (likely him, cuz she's a giant be-yatch to be sure, who could blame him?), thereby causing the other to move and find another smaller place to live (far, far away from us). This scenario could also include option number one, as that's how they seem to roll.

Imagine our surprise when a trailer pulled up this morning and Mr. Crazy and his buddies started loading stuff up. Now I don't want to jump to conclusions, but either he is finally leaving Crazy Bitch, or they are doing some SERIOUS spring cleaning. It's a toss up, but you usually don't get rid of your washer and dryer unless there is something to replace it. And your furniture. And lawn stuff. And you usually don't scrub the trailer floor clean before loading such items, to ensure a squeaky clean ride.

Folks, I believe stage one of scenario 2 is now in effect! Oh. Hell. Yes.

Now don't get me wrong: I don't wish badness on these people. I just want them to take their FUCKEDY-FUCK-FUCK screamfests in the front yard and LEAVE. Seriously. I shit you not. Drunkenly screaming FUCK at him in the front yard. Dude, not cool. There are kids in the neighborhood, and adults with uh, DECORUM. Although I have to say it was a fine lesson for the Little Nugget: "See Babygirl, that's what happens when you have no self-respect."

So who knows how this will unfold. They could reconcile (he'd be an even bigger idiot than we suspected), or she will stay forever, become a drunken verbally abusive harpie (oops, too late!), and continue to loudly curse from her deck (which happens to be next to the Babygirl's swing set, joy-joy)!

Let's hope this turns out well. New neighbors. Nice ones this time. Please?

All for now,

No comments: