Team Nugget Parenting Tip #325

Unsupervised crayon play is highly discouraged and can result in unplanned and unwanted furniture "refinishing", behold:

I swear, she must have had that crayon hidden up her sleeve! And Yes, she is a silly monkey.

All for now,

Nugget

Oh No She Di-int!

Oh yes she did! In this photo op extraordinaire, Little Nugget showed this worm some love and planted a big one right on his little earthwormy self. Yuck!

Since some unscrupulous squirrel saw fit to rip out my fabulous moss, I replaced it with lovely Scottish Moss, conveniently on sale at my local nursery--sweet!!! Baby girl helped out:


Later, she hung with the Bug, no doubt the two were conspiring to secure Team Nugget's plans for world domination:

Watch out!

All for now,

Nugget

Slackers!

OK, OK, so I've been a little slow to post. Hey, I posted twice last week, shouldn't that count for something?

Here's what Team Nugget has been up to since we last spoke (or wrote/read):

I don't remember what we did last Friday--that's too long ago. But I bet it was fun, because that's the day I work at home, so I actually get to see my second-shift workin' husband for a few hours, which is AWESOME! I'm sure the day probably involved some gardening adventures and/or cleaning and laundry.

Saturday. Team Nugget loaded up for a road-trip to a neighboring state for the celebration of my niece's 4th birthday. There was much merriment and good times! Karaoke. Need I say more? And quite possibly the best cupcakes (well, the best buttercream icing) I've ever had, so I had many since I knew I was joining Weight Watchers this week! No regrets--it was some good shit. I allowed the Little Nugget to pick out her cousin's present (I had no clue what to get), and she scored big time with Littlest Pet Shop gear. Way to go Babygirl! You get to pick out the present for your other cousin's b-day party next weekend!

Sunday. Big reunion, hubby Nugget's side. Lot's of fun! Got to show off our fancy walking nugget, since the Little One was still crawling when they saw her last. She charmed the masses with her mad skillz and surprised everyone, including us, with her sudden fondness of dill pickles.

Monday. I don't remember. That was two whole days ago. I think I worked. Yes, I worked from home, got an oil change in the family carriage and took the Little Nugget for a stroll. Hubby Nugget went to the hill and worked on the wildflower patch, and brought me back the best present ever!!!! While he was there (I'll explain the hill some other time--just know it's about an hour away, and where our grapevines live among the trees and deer) he went exploring in the woods and dug up a whole bunch of moss!!!! Later in the evening Babygirl and I planted them under our tree in the backyard. Sweet!!! I can't wait to get some more!!!!

Tuesday. I took a vacation day and we went shopping for deeply discounted overstock playground equipment. Oh it was soooo awesome. A critical Team Nugget core value--if there is a bargain to be had, you must find it!!! I love me a good deal, and people, this was the deal of the decade! Climbing wall, slide, baby swing, toddler swing, regular swing, monkey bar, various accoutrement's for $114!!! That's right, one hundred and fourteen buckaroos. Team Nugget rocks SUPER-HARD!!!

Today. My second vacation day, taken so that we could have a work day on the house we moved out of, but still haven't finished renovating so that we can sell it and finally be rid of it. Crapdoodle, we forgot the tools. I removed plaster anyway--with a 2x4! We also hauled off a bunch of appalling appliances to the scrap metal place. I really wish I had taken video of the giant claw grabbing the fridge off the trailer and flinging it through the air onto a pile of crumpled old metal. Good riddance! I almost would have paid that guy to pick it up and do it again, it was so awesome!

Little Nugget spent the night with Grammy & Grampy to allow such a work day, so baby-free (ahhh), I just planted more creepy thyme and sedum in their respective rock gardens.

So that's what Team Nugget has been up to for the last week! No wonder we need a nap!

All for now,
Nugget

It Honestly Never Occurred to Me...

So I was working in the garden the other day, and saw this HUGE spider on the rock I was about to pick up. It was beautiful, red with black markings, and I had never seen one like it before(nope, not a black widow). I am generally very pro spider (outside the house) and have great respect for their work, killing bugs and such. But given it's size, it was clear that this one could not be allowed to live. I just couldn't stand the idea that it could accidentally wander into the house and be in the same living space as Team Nugget. Not acceptable. So I threw a rock at it. A big rock. AND IT BOUNCED OFF!!! It fricken bounced off the spider!!! It was clearly injured, though, and soon after the "incident", ants came and took it away, circle of life, blah, blah, blah.

Having secured the safety of Team Nugget, I was still curious about the type of spider I had just squished. Google to the rescue! I found this website: http://www.whatsthatbug.com/spiders.html

People write in to ask what kind of spider they have. Very interesting. Instead of throwing rocks, these folks took a picture of their spiders. Hmmm....

All for now,
Nugget

Canine Mascot Profile: Stinkbug (a.k.a. "The Bug")

Let me now take some time away from my busy day of scanning to share with you the wonder that is The Bug. This is, of course, not his real name, as that is being withheld to protect his identity. Behold:

I think that picture best captures his true essence. He answers to many names...Butt Sniffer, Butt Nugget, der Wiener Licker, Humper, Little Bastard, The Bug, and of course, Beelzebug. I think you're gettin the point here. He's not called Stinkbug for nothing. Of all the Team Nugget mascots (including the aquarium goo), he's the most likely candidate to be prescribed puppy prozac (OH how I wish our vet would let us medicate). People, he's not right in the head.

I met Stinkbug early in 2005, when the courtship of Team Nugget was in full swing. Now I'm a dog person, and the four-legged furballs usually catch on to this right away. Not the Bug. He growled at me and bit at my ankles! It took him awhile to get used to hugs and kisses, I'll tell ya! I'm proud to say that after three years of hard work and mutual love and understanding, he only bites me occassionally.

I tend to make up theme songs for some unknown reason, so just humor me on this: it is an ode to the bug (just the lyrics): "Butt Nugget, you're the one / You're the one who gets things done / Barking at the mailman and knocking over trash / Eating moldy couscous and licking Jackson's ass..."

He seems to like it, he comes over for lovin when I sing it :-)

What with the neediness, jealousy, biting, OCD licking and generally unpleasant behavioral problems, it would be an understatement to say that Team Nugget was a little worried how the Bug would react to a new Little Nugget. Afterall, he was, we suspect, abandoned by his previous owners when they had a new addition to their family. He was very skittish when he saw all of the baby gear and required lots of assurance. To our astonishment, he loves, loves LOVES the baby girl!!! Who knew he was a little softy in an asshole suit.

We love the little bastard.

All for now,

Nugget

Bug-cident

Stinkbug (our dog) breached the baby gate and greeted me at the top of the stairs--when I held him back (perhaps a little too enthusiastically, but he started it) anyway, the bug went tumbling down the stairs and went "splat" at the bottom.

Oh no, little one just repeated "butt sniffer" in reference to the bug in question. Must watch what I say around her now...

The bug seems unaffected by it all, except for the strange sweetness he is exhibiting now. Maybe the fall rattled something good in his head.

:-) or maybe not.

P.S. No canine mascots were harmed during this incident

All for now,
Nugget

Day One of Vacation: Welcome to the Ass-Kicking

What with the new house and Nugget's new job, we decided this year we would stick around our home state, more of a local get-away rather than a big travel extravaganza. So every couple of weeks, the plan is to do something touristy around town. Vacation spread throughout the summer! Sweet!

Day One: the zoo. Now I haven't been to our local zoo since high school, and it has gone through some hard times. I'm happy to report it is on the upswing, but man, we could use some more animals, people! Nonetheless, it is a beautiful landscape they have created for critters and folks alike. As usually is the case, it was nappy-time at the zoo, so there wasn't quite enough activity to hold the Little Nugget's attention, but she managed to keep herself occupied with various rocks and sticks that could be picked up along the way.

Now, being the giant dumbass that I am, of course I brought the camera, but forgot to make sure the battery was charged up. We got a total of about 5 pics to document the adventure.

So imagine, if you will, these awesome highlights: Little Nugget giggling at an Ibex that was gathing materials for its nest; a kangaroo checking out Team Nugget from afar; Babygirl surrounded by sheep beggin for lovin, and snacks; humping bumblebees (mid-flight); a meerkat standing on its hindlegs to see the Little One in her stroller; fabulous giraffes and elephants; the two-year old little boy who fell in love with and followed the Little Nugget around; and the goose that clamped down on her foot. She didn't think that was too awesome.

By the end, we were all exhausted. It was a wee bit humid, and a tad warm and we had managed to walk a gazillion miles. Our ass was dragging by the time we got to the car.

We spent the rest of the weekend planting flowers and working on the grapevines...sheesh.

No wonder we're tired.

All for now,
Nugget